The shock of finding out that your cat is a moron

It is not that I have never suspected it in the past. It is not that there haven't been warnings throughout the years. This past Tuesday, however, I finally got my perfect proof: The cat we own - or rather the cat owning us - is a moron.

It was not easy to accept at first, but when the furball got stuck under the shoe cabinet (where he tried to kill a spider) and could not get his head out anymore, not even I could deny it any longer.

Does anyone have hints and tips on how to raise our cat's IQ? We have another cat in the neighborhood who is rather snobbish and seems to look down on poor dumb S all the time. I know S could kick Snob Cat's furry ass any old time, but I am afraid he'd get distracted during the ass-kicking and maybe embarrass himself. So I'd rather work on his IQ for a bit before I send S onto the feline battlefield.

I'd take any advice on improving furball-survival-skills, too. Who knows, next time he gets stuck I might be at work and then he'd have his head under the shoe cabinet for half the day. It would be nice if he could at least solve math problems while waiting....